Jason Youngberg's Web Site :: Buttons

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Everyone has seen these type of buttons. Small, round about 3 inches across with a cute little remark or political slogan. Well I've been collecting these for a while, ones that reflect my likes and interests, others just made me laugh or reflected major attitude problems (I don't always agree with some of them though).

Personal Philosophies
When the going gets weird, the weird turn Pro Stupid People Shouldn't Breed I didn't claw my what to the top of the food chain to eat veggies! If you think I'm weird, I know you're boring. Live the dream. For every person with a spark of genius, there are a hundred with ignition trouble. Outnumbered, yes. Out maneuvered, maybe. Outclassed, Never! It is better to light a flamethrower than to curse the darkness Keep the books BURN the censors Censor: a man who thinks he knows more than you should So many books, so little time Imagination is intelligence having fun Happiness is the planet Earth in your rear viewscreen. Wait'll they get a load of me! I'm here to chew bubble-gum and kick ass; and I forgot the gum I intend to live forever or die trying If you are smoking I will assume you are on fire, and take appropriate measures Lead, follow, or get the hell out of my way. Warning! I believe in preemtive strikes and parting shots. The ideal situation is to have massive computing power right at home. Something that dims street lights and shrinks the picture on the neighbor's TVs when you boot it up. If it's not on fire, it's a software problem. Even the worst day of programming is better than the best day of working. Don't try to outweird me -- I get stranger things than you in my breakfast cereal! Incorrigible Punster. Do not incorrige. I used to be sane, but I got better. I'll try being nicer if you'll try being smarter. My software never has bugs. It just develops random features. Everyone is entitled to be stupid, but some people abuse the privilege. Better WEIRD than DULL Stand back! I have a brain and I'm not afraid to use it!
Cats
Dogs come when called... Cats have an answering machine and may get back to you. Anything not nailed down is a cat toy. Anything that can be clawed up is not nailed down.
SCIENCE & LEARNING!!!
Quantum Physics Catch the Wave! Who needs fantasy when you have physics E=mc²+3d6 A seminar on time travel will be held three months ago The universe does not have laws, it has habits, and habits can be broken. Another case of too many scientists, not enough hunchbacks. They say that knowledge will open many doors. I prefer a lockpick. A student who changes the course of history is usually taking an exam. The difference between genius and stupidity is that genius has its limits.
Star Trek and other Science Fiction
When Picard says "Fire at will!" Riker get nervous. The hell with the prime directive. Let's kill something. It is an ancient Klingon ritual for courage. Trust me Wesley Mr.Worf, please show Ensign Crusher the forward torpedo tubes (from the inside) The grass is always greener in the next dimension. Beam me up scotty, the elevators don't work. amateur timelord Anything free is worth what you paid for it If it's not SCOTTISH it's crap I'd Rather Trust A Ferengi Than A Politician. Did the aliens forget to remove your anal probe? I think so Brain, but isn't it your turn to put the tutus on the Klingons?
100% Pure Attitude
When the going gets tough the tough call for an airstrike. It matter not whether you win or lose. It matters whether I win or lose. Talent does what it can. Genius does what it must. I do what I get paid to do. Do not meddle in the affairs of dragons. For you are crunchy and good with katsup. Interfere! Of course we'll interfere! Always do what you're best at I always say. What this country needs is a good 5 dollar plasma weapon. Pay your opponent a compliment. He'll go crazy wondering what you're plotting against him. Blood is thicker than water...and much tastier. Friends come and go, but enemies accumulate...in a pile at my feet. Everybody need a hobby--mine is revenge That's Mr Bastard to you! Anytime anywhere... just show me where they are! Heaven doesn't want me and Hell's afraid I'm going to take over. I don't know. I don't care. That's why they put me in charge. We're a paranoid schizophrenic, and we outnumber you two to one. Excuse me while I change into something more formidable. Lightning is one hell of a murder weapon. and the best part is it can't be traced Gun control is being able to hit your target We're professionals Do not try this at home! It's not whether you win or lose, but how you you play the game. So cheat, and win. When in doubt as to the most advantageous strategy to vanquish your opponents, CHARGE! There is no such things as too much firepower. Another triumph for truth justice and automatic weapons Warning! Equipped with self-destructing protective mechanism. Fight organized crime Abolish the IRS Fight rush hour traffic. Legalize vehicular weaponry. Old age and treachery will always defeat youth and skill If You Can't Dazzle Them With STYLE, Riddle Them With Bullets. I Don't Break Rules. I Ignore Them. There are very few personal problems that can't be solved with a suitable application of high explosives! Those of you who think you know everything are very annoying to those of us who do! Some people are alive only because it's illegal to kill them.
Humor
Talk is Cheap Because Supply Exceeds Demand. Reality is an illusion caused by an imaginary deficiency. If You're Right 90% of the Time, Why Quibble about the Remaining 3%? We cheat the other guy then pass the savings on to you. I remember when Windows were washed, Mice were trapped, & Unix guarded the harem. Stupidity This Good Takes Teamwork. It's a damned poor mind that can't think of at least two ways to spell any word. My mind is made up. Don't confuse me with facts. Nuke Congress from orbit. It's the only way to be sure. Eagles Soar, but a weasel will never get sucked into a jet engine. Somewhere on the globe, every ten seconds, a woman is giving birth to a child. We must find her and stop her immediately. The problem with troubleshooting is that trouble usually shoots back. This Isn't Fun. I've Had Fun Before, and This Isn't It. Too many freaks, not enough circuses
Role Playing Games
It is better for you character to die on his feet than to live on his knees. Game Masters are not gods. They just tell them what to do. Good dice rolls are better than good tactics, anytime. Any excuse to wear a sword is a good excuse The three most dangerous things in the world are a game designer with a new system, a game company with a lawyer, and a player with a handful of dice. Heigh ho, heigh ho, it's off to game we go, with laser rays and hand grenades heigh ho, heigh ho. Lawful game master--and I pick the laws The DM is always right! Cruel, sadistic, vicious, etc. but always right. There is nothing wrong with game masters that reasoning with them won't aggravate./li> So much for the old code against killing! Cyberpunk Better killing through technology If at first you don't succeed, but the GM's Pizza. Anything not nailed down is mine. Anything I can pry loose is not nailed down. Just Once, I'd like there to be more of us tan them. The light at the tunnel may be an oncoming dragon. Half of all gamers never read the rules. Half of all gamers argue about the rules. Unfortunately, it's the same half. Game mastering requires a unique blend of psychology and extreme violence. I expect chaos, blood, and lots of dead bodies. Let's play. More hit points than you can possibly imagine I'm not a paladin--killing is more of a hobby with me Dragon horde!? I thought you said dragon Hoard! Boiling Oil... Fireballs... Boulders... Players accept that, but bombarding them with rules is exactly the kind of thing that gives gaming a bad name. The more I deal with my Game master, the more I understand terrorism.
Be afraid, be VERY afraid
NEGOTIATION is what happens when both sides are certain that they can't win. At any time, at any place, my snipers can drop you. Go in peace. There's no evidence to show I'm violent! I killed both the witnesses! Legally it's questionable. Morally it's disgusting. Personally, I like it. By Friday we expect to control the country In retrospect, that was a terrible decision. Fortunately, everyone else who knows that is dead now. "Those aren't medals for valor. They're for violence." Of course we have to kill and maim and destroy: we stand for everything that's good and decent in the world. Warning! My gun is bigger than my brain. I'm not worried about the bullet with my name on it, just the thousands marked "Occupant."' Stupidity got us into this mess. Now why can't it get us out? Never Believe Anything Until it has been officially denied. I don't lie. I give creative estimates. This is a test. Had this been an actual emergency, we would have fled in terror, and you would not have been informed. I'm not shy, I'm just studying my prey. That which does not kill us makes us stronger. That which does kill us makes us makes us stronger still. In Order to Maintain your Self-Respect, it's sometimes Necessary to Lie and Cheat. Been there, done that, bought the t-shirt, read the novel, nitpicked the movie, rented the video, flamed the critic, played the Nintendo game, mastered the CD-ROM counterpart, visited the Web site, blacklisted the Web site upkeeper, bought the soundtrack, wrote fan fiction about it, joined the fan club.