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House of Thieves

Makoto {voiceover}: Hello my name is Makoto Mizuhara. A normal high school student from Shiniobi High. I was working on a special science project when something something went horribly wrong.

Crow: My cat's eye marble ate the school!

Makoto {voiceover}: I've suddenly been transported to a mysterious world called El Hazard. What is going to happen to me in such an unpredictable place?


Tom (as sport's announcer): And entering from the north side of the field, the Iowa Hawkeyes!
Crow (as angry chef): She put me out of business.

Nanami: {gong} Hmmm not bad. Maloy and soy sauce!
Waitress: One maloy!

Crow (whispers): Quick, what's Maloy?

Makoto {voiceover}: That's Nanami.

All: Hi Financial Tryannt.

Fuji is lecturing about history

Joel: Not a very popular class is it?

Makoto {voiceover}: And there's Mr.Fujisawa

All: Hi Drunk.

Jinnai: Crush your enemies and conquer the world! {laugh}
Makoto {voiceover}: And even Jinnai.

All: Hello Prozac Poster Boy.

Makoto: All of them seem to have found a place in this world and each one has a definite purpose. You gotta have a purpose. Maybe I have one also.

Tom: Nope, you're just a slacker.


Dr.Schtal: Oh ho, H2O2 mixed with MnO2 results in O2. {Tom: Oxygen is green?} My word you simply astonish me lad. Your knowledge of chemistry is much greater than I imagined.
Makoto: Well I did get an A in science. My teacher said I had a knack.

Crow: ...for explosions.

Dr.Schtal: So tell me what exactly were you trying to prove with that experiment?

Tom: That I can banish soot instantly.

Makoto:I don't understand. I was only discharging the oxygen. That's so weird. Things react differently in my world from yours.

Joel: Lame excuse.

Schtal: {chuckles} Don't worry about it, you just need to be patient as you learn here. {Makoto: Yeah}

{Nanami chopping vegetable}

Joel: The everlasting cabbage!
Tom acts like it's a song beat.

Nanami: We have a motto 'excellent quality, food, and service. There's a lot of high ranking officials who dine here. Even the royal family last night. So if you want to be part of the restaurant staff then please don't forget it. {Makoto: Sure}
Customer: Hey can I get my check?
Nanami: Yessss I'll be right there. Come on Makoto.
Makoto: All right I'll do it.

Joel (when Makoto raises cleaver): Ahhh Psycho!

Nanami: Thank you, come back again. Ummm it's perfect. Hey, you're order's ready for the cafrey soup and a pancake. Dish up the salad will ya? {Waitress: OK} How are you commin' along?
{Makoto is being very presice}

Joel: Wait, he forgot to make sure each piece has the same volume!

Nanami: They're precise all right. By the time you get through cutting them they'll be rotten.
Makoto: But it would be unfair if I didn't cut each piece exactly the same.
Nanami: Be unfair. Maybe you're not well suited for this job...either.

Tom: Ouch! That's the 3rd job he's lost since last episode.

Alliele: Please stop I can't take any more. My butt's gone to sleep. What do I have to learn this stuff for anyway?
Fuji: Because it's useful. Studying history and literature will help to prepare you for the future.
Alliele: But how can learning about Earth history and literature be of any use to somebody in El Hazard? I gotta a question!
Fuji: Go ahead girl in the back.

Crow: Gee, I wonder who else he could mean.

Alliele: Let's compare similarities between our world and your Earth. For instance farming and hunting are alike yet....{yadda yadda yadda}...metaphysical influence.

Tom: Uh-oh, now we're getting into philosophy.

Fuji: I'm afraid you've lost me.
{Alliele and Fuji have switched places}
Alliele: Therefore it becomes a moot point if the validity of historical facts are in question.

Joel: How can you talk about history if you don't care about if the events really happened?

Fuji: I see.
Mind if I ask what you're doing?
Fuji: What does it look like? I'm listening to her lecture. By her looks you wouldn't guess she's a mental dymano. I'm amazed at how much she's taught me about El Hazard.

Tom (drunk): Like where the bars are.

Alliele: I will not put up with students talking in my class. Have you understood everything so far? {Fuji: Yes} then I'll proceed to the next subject.

{Makoto realized that he's drawing a picture of Rune Venus}

Crow: Now to add the moustache and horns. heh heh heh

Makoto: Wha, what am I doing? {heart pounding}

Tom makes Psycho music.
Joel: Behind you! Behind you!

Rune: Hello Makoto, what are you drawing?
Makoto: {gulp} It's nothing. How are you today, Princess Rune?
Rune: I'm fine, but you look depressed.
Makoto: No no no, I'm great.
Rune: I can understand if your spirits are low after what happened Dr.Schtalembaugh's labatory.
Makoto: Huh? how did you hear about that.
Rune: {giggle} Very little goes on inside the palace that doesn't reach my ears.

Crow (F): Explosions for instance.

Makoto: You know All I want to do is contribute something and be a useful citizen while I'm living here in Roshtaria.
Rune: Oh, but why?
Makoto: Well I wouldn't want you to think we're taking advantage.
Rune: You needn't feel that way after all you ARE a guest.

Joel: Albeit a guest who never changes his clothes and barges into private baths.

Makoto: Yeah, but I want someone to appreciate that I'm here. I want to see somebody smiling because I make a difference to them.
Rune: Huh
Nanami: Makoto! {Makoto: Huh} Oh it's awful.
Makoto: What's wrong?...Nanami what happened?
Nanami: We're all out of vegetables!
Makoto: So why don't you just go to the market and buy some?

Tom: Oh that Makoto! He always has the right answer!

Nanami: The marketplace and every other produce shop in town have nearly out!
Makoto and Rune: What?

Crow: So she knows about lab mistakes but not a local crisis. Great leadership!

Makoto: They do have a few left though these are kinda picked over aren't they.
Nanami: Did you notice the prices?
Makoto: What how much? 20,000 roshtals, each! They got to be kidding! That's outrageous!

Crow: Yeah, I paid 30,000 not five minutes ago.
Joel: This would be considered a sale in Japan.

Nanami: Yeah, prices are this bad all over town.
Makoto: How come? Why are they so expensive
Vendor: I have no choice. There's a vegetable shortage going on.
Makoto: What's causing it?
Vendor: I wish I knew. No one's going to shell out all that cash for greens. My store will go under then I'll have to move to the poorhouse {takes a bite out of a cucumber} Ahhhhhh!

Tom: Well, that bite was worth about 2000 roshtals right there.

{raided field}
Nanami: This is a pretty sorry plant.

Crow (F): I shouldn't have stepped on it.

Makoto: No wonder there aren't any vegetables. What are you doing down there Nanami?
Nanami: I'm trying to scrounge up anything that's still worth eating. You might help me instead of standing around watching.
Makoto: All right. {Tom: For a 25% cut.}
Nanami: {Nanami bumps into Londs} Oww! {Crow: Giant!} {falls over backward}
Makoto: Are you OK? Oh, hi Londs.
Londs: Well Makoto, what are you and she doing here?

Joel: Scavenging, wanna help?

Makoto: We're just trying to get to the bottom of the vegetables shortage. And you guys?
Londs: A similar quest. We are looking for the criminal who stole these crops.
Soldier: Sir Londs!
Londs: What is it?
Soldier: I think you should take a look at this.

Crow: This potato is shaped like Elvis!

Nanami: It is a trail!
Makoto: You got to be kidding, the thieves marked a path?

Joel: I smell a rat, a big commie rat.

Nanami: It will be easy to follow them then.
Londs: The bounty yielded by the sweat and blood of all farmers have been taken by savages! I demand that the party responsible be arrested at all costs!

Tom: Uhhh sir, we're right here. You don't have to shout.

{going down the path}

Tom (at flower with mouth): Feed me!

Guard: Look there's one.
Londs: We're on the right track.
Nanami: What a waste.

Crow (F): I wish I had a cart to carry these.

{reach clearing}
Nanami: What's that? Is it their hideout?
Londs: Yes it's a safe house.

Joel: With Mr. and Mrs.Safe and Safe Jr.

Londs: Everyone be careful and stay alert.
{they enter the dome}
Nanami: Wow...Geez a veggie Mt.Everest
Tom: I don't think that's the best way to store vegetables.

Jinnai: (laughs) You looking for something Makoto Mizuhara?

Crow: Just found it, thanks!

Makoto: It's Jinnai!
Nanami: You brat!
Jinnai: What? little kid sister! I didn't know you came to this world too.
Nanami: Errrrrr I can't believe you'd take all of this!
Jinnai: Huh? Take what?
Nanami: These vegetables, Brainless. You're ruining my restaurant.
Jinnai: You're pulling a fast one I have no idea what you're rattling on about.
Nanami: Ooooo When I get done with you Kasukiko, you're going to be a vegetable yourself!

Crow and Tom: Too late!
Joel: Let me guess: squash?

Makoto: Calm down, get a hold of yourself. Jinnai return the vegetables you stole right now!
{Bugrom appear}

Tom: Don't wanna.

Jinnai: I have no intention of giving you the produce we grew with tender loving care in our own little patch.
Nanami: Liar, you can't even grow a beard let alone some crops.

Crow: Hey Joel, I bet you know how he feels.

Makoto: Come on, we all know who's they are.
Jinnai: Well then I guess you have plenty of weighty evidence on your side to prove it.
Makoto: We couldn't have found your hiding place without following the vegetables. What more evidence do we need?
Jinnai: I think this is a conspiracy and that someone is framing me with falsely planted evidence.
Makoto: Falsely?
Jinnai: And your pilfered greens. Is the owner's name written on every skin leaf and peel of the missing goods. What hour of the day and day of the week did someone witness me stealing them? What's the matter sherlock? Might not have sufficient evidence?

Joel: Did he take lessons from the OJ defence team?

Makoto: Well not now.
Nanami: It's impossible to win an argument with him even when he's guilty as sin. I'm surprised he's not a lawyer.
Londs: Villain!

Crow (deep voice): I'm still here! Don't ignore me!

{Jinnai laughs}
{commercial sign}

{Bugrom stealing more crops}

Crow (to guards): Use a hose, drown em!

Jinnai: Huh, all the guards in Roshtaria is no match of a mind of pure meanness. {laugh}

Joel: I saw this in an old Loony Tunes episode.

Nanami: This thievery has got to stop. This is killing my business. I'm on the verge of bankruptcy. Maybe it wouldn't be so awful if I didn't make so many vegetarian dishes.

Joel: Well I didn't claw my way to the top of the food chain just to eat veggies.
Crow (F): Guess I'll have to start serving steak.

Fuji: Hummm What about increasing the number of guards you've got?
Londs: We haven't got the manpower to spare.

Joel: Get temps.

Fuji: Then let's label our food the way Jinnai mentioned.
Makoto: I'm fairly certain he meant that to be scarcastic.
Nanami: Makoto, you've got to come up with a good plan.

Tom: Why me?

Makoto: I wish I could. I just can't think of anything.
Nanami: Hey Princess Rune, Princess Rune? Hello?
Rune: Huh, yes?

Crow (F): Oh sorry, I'm back now.

Nanami: Do you have any suggestions? {hmm} Oh all right I'll just have to take care of the problem myself!
Makoto: Wait, what are you going to do?
Nanami: We're related. If anyone's going to drive a nail into his coffin, I will.
Makoto: Hold on a sec, it's only vegetables
Nanami: As of now we're no longer brother and sister. He's always getting in my way! {runs into serving girl}

Tom (F): Like you are!

Nanami: I'm terrible sorry.
Makoto: Are you OK Nanami?
Nanami: Oh no, these are my favorite shorts. Oh the stain will never come out!

Joel: Hey, how can she get biker shorts in El Hazard?

Makoto: Hey I just had a brainstorm!

{Makoto having fun in the lab}

Tom (cheerfully): Time to blow up the lab again.

Makoto: I've done it. I think we've got a batch that's easily vitrified.
Dr.Schtal: Good job.{laugh}
Makoto: {tests mix} Dr.Schtalubaugh, we're ready to go. Ha!

{Bugrom steals crops again}

Crow (as guard gets knocked out): Guard duty is dull, a quick nap won't hurt anything.

Jinnai: Be careful, this is our property now watch what you're doing! What? {notices flower is pink} Now I could have sworn that these flowers had white petals. Huh, oh well. Hey move it let's blow out of here before dawn.
Storekeeper: My business is doomed.

Joel (as Storekeeper): Shoulda went into plastics.

{Jinnai and Deva laugh}

Deva: Jinnai, you're a genius. A true master thief I now see what you meant by starving the enemy out.
Jinnai: The wretched inhabitants of this kingdom will soon be weakened by hunger. Victory! We win the war without a battle!
Deva: Oh brilliant plan and so deliciously mean also. But now that you pirated this botanic bounty have you even thought about what you were going to do with it? We couldn't eat all this in a lifetime!
Jinnai: I already have a solution
{Bugrom with veggie slices on their faces}

Joel: Did the fall on a salad bar?

Jinnai: Beauty packs, to tone and invigorate the skin. My fiendishly clever plan insures that nothing will be wasted. My dear you are looking at the first example of recyclable evil.

Tom: What's next an informerical?

Deva: Who knew vegetables were so versatile? Mr.Jinnai, I am astonished. Do you think I can try some out? My pores are such a mess and my skin is so oily.
Jinnai: Sure, you can take a bath in the stuff we all the vegetables we've got. We wouldn't want them to go rotten. {laugh}

Crow: --like you.

Makoto: The joke's on you Jinnai.
Deva: What?
Jinnai: Humph, it just had to be you.
Makoto: Give back what you've stolen!
Jinnai: I won't stand for any more of your false accusations.
Makoto: You're a common crook and this time I can prove it!

Joel: Oh there's nothing common about me.

Jinnai: So Mizuhara's got proof against me does he. Where is it?
{Deva laughs}
Makoto: Here!
Jinnai: Oh show us!
Makoto: It'll be my pleasure. You've claimed to have grown these vegetables yourself isn't that right? {throws cucumber at Jinnai}

Tom: Throw it home for a double play!

Jinnai: Ah! You might have hurt me like that!
Makoto: All right Jinnai, if you did plant that, then what's the color on the inside?
Jinnai: That question is beyond absurd we know it can only be white!
Makoto: Wrong it's red!
Jinnai: Red?! {laugh} I see your mind has gone oh but I'll humor you. {breaks open zuccini and sees that it IS red} What's this? Your idea of a prank?

All improv debate about the color of the dye.

Makoto: If you had spent more time studying chemistry you'd have known this is known of a capillary phenomenon. {Flashback} I made up a special solution that we spread over the vegetable field. When it reacted with the plants it turned red having the effect of a harmless dye. No one will buy your bogus explanations now. Give up!

Crow: Thanks for waiting before telling us.

Jinnai: {gets angry} Mizhuara, why must you always get in my way huh?! Kill them all pulverize them into a hill of fertilizer!

Joel (as Prince John from Men In Tights): Hurt them! Hurt them!

Deva {about Margret}: His skin how beautiful it is!

Tom: I don't know about you two, but a Bugrom with good skin is still ugly.
Joel and Crow mumble in agreement.

{battle starts, Makoto runs away as Fuji charges}
Fuji: Fujisawa Punch! Fujisawa Kick!

Crow: Fujisawa Power Walking!

Alliele: That's right! Squash em!
Nanami: Ahh don't hurt the vegetables.

Joel: Hey, when you start fighting THEN you can give suggestions.

Alliele: Ah Nanami look out, he's going to get ya. Alliele Flying Kick! {doesn't work} Oh my.

Tom: Kids, do NOT try this at home.

Makoto: Call your Bugrom bullies off.
Jinnai: Fat chance of that. Here's a little something for you.
Nanami: Watch out Makoto! Head's up.
Jinnai: Darn it. Will you cooperate and not move.

Crow: Hey, I'm not THAT accommodating!

Nanami: You know something, you're a pig! Your behavior is simple inexcusable!
Jinnai: Nanami, how dare you be so defiant to your big brother!
Nanami: I'm not your sister anymore. No doubt about it, you're adopted.
{Jinnais argue and have food fight}

Joel: See, when she fights she doesn't care about the vegetables.

Makoto: Well you please stop. Hello there...
Deva: I've never witnessed combat like this before!
Makoto: You guys put the vegetables down all right?
Jinnai: That's it the funnnnn's over! {throws cucumber, moves like a boomerang} You! You can't be lucky all the time! {cucumber hits him in the back of the head}

Tom: Yes we can!
Joel: Sorry, we're not buying this.

Nanami: He's a looser.
Deva: Oh my, Mr.Jinnai, we'd better go. Retreat! Go!

Crow (F): It's time for the episode to end anyway.

Fuji: The bugrom should enjoy a quiet journey home as long as he's unconscious.
Nanami: Makoto, I owe it to you. I can reopen the doors to my restaurant.

Tom (F): Once I bribe the health inspector of course.

Makoto: That's good I'm glad I helped.
Alliele: If you're done saving the day, then could someone please get me outta here?

Joel: Just leave her. She wasn't much help in the fight.
Tom: Nope, you gotta save the comic relief.
Crow: You'd think that after the Shrine of Wind, she'd be used to this.

{palace balcony, Makoto is working on his drawing.}
Rune: Hello Makoto. {Makoto: Hi} I thought I'd find you here. You're always studying something. What subject is it this time?
Makoto: Oh I'm just brushing up on my quantum mechanics.
Rune: Oh my, even the name alone makes it sound difficult.
Makoto: It's not bad.

Tom: and without a supercollieder, totally academic.

Rune: Londs and the others are very grateful for your help. Your wisdom saved Roshtaria from serious peril. And I would like to thank you also.

Joel: Oh like they couldn't have taken the stuff back by force.

Makoto: Oh boy. I'm just glad I was able to contribute.
Rune: I understand now why you feel the need to make a difference {Makoto: Yeah?} As for me, I want my subject to be glad I'm here. By doing all I can for them.

Crow (F): I guess I should start by actually paying attention to them.

Makoto: That's great.
{wind blows open notebook to Makoto's drawing of Rune}

Crow (in deep voice): Time to make life hard for Makoto heh heh heh.

Rune: Oh.
Makoto: What? Ahhhhh!
Makoto: This is too embarrassing. What am I going to do?

Joel: Oh come on, it's not that bad!
Crow: Maybe dropping dead to save you from the embarassment?
Tom: Hey, it's a compliment to draw a picture of someone in your notebook.
Joel: Is this what Fermat was doing when he should have been proving that theroem?

Episode 10: Jungle Beast

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